The Medium's Daughter

Spirit guides will take what you love to give you what you need. Here's how to work with them more clearly.

Let’s get witchy. I just finished the most breathtaking walk down my little farm dirt road that leads to the Victorian rectory and parsonage across the street, with nothing behind it but dramatic cliffs shooting down to the light blue, rugged sea. Two blackbirds, almost as if playing tag with me, stayed near as I walked down the path, where hemlock lines the road and has shot up taller than me (equal parts otherworldly and a little unsettling—the same deadly, poisonous herb that sentenced Socrates to death).

Walking the grassy headlands lining the sea, blackberry bushes are at the tail end of flowering, and the white yarrow takes me aback—offering its energetic shield, peace, and psychic protection. I suddenly realize that my most beloved Ceylon moonstone ring has gone missing. This is a rather frequent occurrence for me: one of my most sacred talisman pieces completely vanishes from my jewelry drawer, and I’m left pining for it for quite some time (until it mysteriously pops up again).

Since the topic is fresh in my heart, if something special of yours has vanished—even though you know you didn’t lose it—I have a little insight and a suggestion for you to try.

As the daughter of the most gifted psychic medium I’ve ever met (and I’ve met many in my industry), and having the gift of mediumship myself—albeit one I’ve turned off and am not quite ready to delve into headfirst—something I’m always having to “deal with” is spirits. Spirits attaching to me, shaking the bed just as I’m falling asleep, turning on lights when I walk under them, using electronics to try to connect with me, intruding on my dreams. It’s honestly a burden at this point in my life. I feel like I’m already dedicating my energy and gifts to the living, and I don’t quite have the time to develop, communicate with, and help the departed. It’s not my strongest gift, and it truthfully scares me. Even when I try to set firm boundaries with spirits, they often don’t listen. I ultimately have to call my mom to clear them for me, which she does in an effortless, fellow swoop—and for that, I am beyond grateful.

But there is one interesting back and forth I do have—with my spirit guides.

Before I get into that, let’s clarify something I’m often asked: what’s the difference between departed spirits and spirit guides?

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Spirit Guides

• Purposeful and benevolent: Their sole intent is to help you grow, heal, evolve, and fulfill your soul’s path.

• Higher vibration: They reside in spiritual realms beyond the Earth plane, often connected to your higher self or soul contracts.

• Often assigned before birth: Many guides agree to walk with you through this life (like ancestral allies, teachers, or beings from higher dimensions).

• Non-earthbound: They are not stuck or lingering—they move freely across dimensions.

• Communicate through intuition, synchronicities, dreams, gut feelings, or symbols.

• May appear as: former ancestors, animal spirits, ascended beings, or energies you feel but don’t see.

• Never fear-based or invasive: their presence feels wise, loving, spacious, and calm.

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"Ghosts" (Earthbound Spirits)

• Unresolved or stuck: Typically souls who have not fully crossed over—often due to trauma, confusion, attachment, or sudden death.

• Lower vibration: They exist in a liminal space between worlds, often looping or lingering in familiar places.

• Tied to a person/place/event: They may haunt or revisit certain locations or people due to unfinished business or emotional tethering.

• Earthbound consciousness: They still think and act as they did in life—sometimes confused, emotional, or territorial.

• May communicate through disturbances, dreams, chills, apparitions, scents, or technological interference.

• Not necessarily malicious, but their energy may feel heavy, sad, or chaotic.

If spirits are attaching to you or following you home, it’s likely because you’re spiritually open, energetically porous, or unconsciously signaling permission—often without realizing it.

Now that we have clarity on the difference between benevolent spirit guides and stuck spirits, let’s talk about a little trick I’ve learned. It took me a couple of years to grasp.

My spirit guides will often hide things I value immensely in order to get my attention. More importantly, they do it to help me receive the message they’ve been trying to deliver.

So here’s a little practice to try when you feel your spirit guides are nudging you. Or if you’re a TBMer, let’s get into “pings” more deeply: